Simplified I

The Earth began to cool,
The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools,
We built a wall, we built the pyramids!



AYE
for the Geekiest show ever.

The Big Bang simplified

Once there was nothing,
Then there was a Big Bang,
because they say over extremely long period of times, the impossible becomes inevitable. (Quantum Physics)
So if you wait long enough, surely a bang will come along.

That bang created a small dot called the universe.
This small dot was too hot for anything thou,
but because it bangs outwards, it expands forever.
As it expands, it cools.
Some Cosmic Fart cooled into Cosmic Diarrhea,
then some Cosmic Diarrhea cooled into Cosmic Shit.

Then because of Gravity, a whole bunch of Cosmic Shit got together at some random place.
Then newton said they started orbiting the big piece of Cosmic Shit in the middle that caught fire.
And poof! A solar system including Earth was formed.

Then on Earth,
Some chemicals reacted with who knows what to become bacterial life.
This bacterial life then slowly Evolved into Dinosaurs and all that stuff.
Then one day, another piece of Cosmic Shit visited Earth.
Causing everyone to freeze their ass off.
They called it mass extinction. These kind of mass extinctions happened about 7 times, including the current ongoing one.
But we only remembered the one with Dinosaurs, cause we love Dinosaurs.
Some mammals survived, during the Dinosaurs' one.
Then some of these mammals in Africa evolved into Man and Women -.-

And we all came from Africa living happily ever after.

How God created Earth Simplified

Once there was God.
How did God come about was not important,
He was always there.
God has the power to create.

One day he created space for himself, cause he was everywhere.
A huge space of mostly nothing but himself.
Then God littered a tiny weeny bit of Stuff over the huge space.
In one of these chunks of Stuff, God puts some Stuff that rotates around a another piece of Stuff.
Then God made the center piece of Stuff glow, It became the Shiny piece of Stuff
And God chose the fourth piece of Stuff that rotates around the Shiny piece of Stuff to become Earth.

Then on Earth,
God created a ridiculous amount of different species of life,
which he didn't like and wiped out.
Leaving the total species count currently less than 1% of the total he ever made.
But some where along the line, God creates a Man.
from this Man, He took out a rib.
That rib became a Women.

And we all came from that Man and Women living happily ever after.

In the End

We either came from complete pure dumb luck.
Or
We were created by an incomprehensible being who works in mysterious ways.

The atheist say they can prove the pure dumb luck to be true.
The religious say they have faith the mysterious being exists.
I say NAY.
maybe one is true,
maybe both are on to something,
maybe none are creative enough,
maybe one, both and none can be true at the same time if you think in logic too high for the human mind to comprehend.

Love.
Spreads like Nutella.